Will I Ever Have Time Again?

The trio of 29-year-old English students I've mentioned who we had the pleasure of meeting the other day, not only interviewed, but befriended us AND treated us to lunch. Yet another instance of the hospitality that people in Asia (and MANY places in the world) offer up so naturally, but that I feel you'd be hard-pressed to have reciprocated in the U.S. Not that people in the States are necessarily UN-friendly, it's just that it seems a rare thing for us to go out of our way to be generous to a total stranger, especially one who barely speaks our language, if at all.

A good friend of ours has begged to differ with us about this point and assures us that a foreigner would be likely to receive a warm reception if, for example, visiting the midwest. I personally don't believe it. Having traveled fairly extensively internationally I reflect on the generosity I've received in various countries - In Seoul, Korea a student took off work for an entire day to tour me around town and refused to let me pay for lunch or tea; In Arequipa, Peru I befriended a girl on an overnight bus and after chatting the night away, we arrived exhausted and her mother took us in, letting me sleep in her bed while preparing a wonderful meal for us; In Samut Songkhram, Thailand were were given free food by several people and shown around town by another young man; In Jianshui, China a poor, old man buys us lunch and refuses to let us treat him in return - I could go on, but the point is, that even though I think of myself as helpful and compassionate to other travelers, I have never once offered to buy anyone coffee and show them around San Francisco. And would I dare invite a total stranger into my home? Not for lack of opportunity have these thoughts crossed my mind. For years I rode Muni to work along the main route from downtown to Coit Tower/Fisherman's Wharf area and frequently saw backpackers studying their maps en-route. Not for lack of compassion or fear did I leave them alone to their task, but for lack of time.


This, I believe, is the true crux of the matter. We, in the developed world, really don't seem to have any to spare! Whether it's rushing to work, or the gym, or home to your family, or happy hour with friends, or household chores... I know I'm not alone in feeling like I never had a free moment. Let me ask - How long has it taken you to finish just one novel in the past year? In the past year I've read at least 30! This would've been completely impossible if I were at home. So what would it take for me to take the time out to help a TOTAL STRANGER?

Through my travels I've fallen deeply in love with the more laid-back approach that much of the rest of the world has to time. In Latin America they say "manana!" (tomorrow). It's taken me awhile on the road, on this and previous extended trips, just to unwind enough not only to accept this way of thinking, but adopt it. For example - The train's three hours late, or the person that sold me my bus ticket said the ride would be 8 hours and instead it's 12. What is there to do but just accept it. But more importantly, what is the valuable lesson to be learned by it? Relax, and go with the flow. In all honesty, I still find it hard at times and have the tendency to regress to the "Give me now!", "Do it now!" mentality, but I'm trying...

And so here's yet another thing I ask myself regarding Will I ever be Satisfied Again? And if not, can I hold onto this slowing of time at least in my OWN life if the rest of society is racing around me?