Vision Quest

(Friday, August 11)

Finally returned to Delhi via overnight bus from Dharamsala this morning. I had two scheduled appointments for the afternoon - First, with the Doctor that lasered the many holes in my retinas and Second, with Dr. Chaudhary who will perform the Lasik surgery. They found that the holes in my retinas had healed nicely and I was deemed ready to proceed with the corrective surgery. So, did I want to schedule it for tomorrow? Tomorrow?! So here I find myself, in my last 24 hours of high nearsightedness (-6.0 to -6.25, wearing glasses + contacts for 25 years), excited and nervous about how this next day will unfold. Has the Doctor been thorough enough? Have I asked enough or the right questions? I feel the answer is "yes", but I can't help the nervousness, even if I was having the procedure done in the U.S. We've gotten a nicer, cleaner room for my 2-3 day recovery as I'm instructed to stay indoors to avoid infection due to the heavy dust + pollution here. Also, no computer, TV or reading to let my eyes heal without strain. Audio books + practicing meditation are going to come in handy so I'm not bored to tears and to make use of my down-time. I know I'll also be in good hands with Nurse Darin by my side :) Please send lots of love and good karma this way to ensure that all goes well. To be continued...



(Saturday, August 12)

I sat awaiting my appointed time, full of last-minute apprehension + questions. I struggled to clear my mind and get in some positive, pre-surgery meditation to put me in a better mental state. Meanwhile, Darin sat by my side smiling + holding my hand, much more excited + optimistic. Some final testing was performed before I was ushered into a clean room for final prep and instructions. Soon I was laying beneath the laser, sheathed like a corpse but for one exposed eye. The actual procedure was done one eye at a time and took less than 10 min. total. Though painless, it WAS frightening as my cornea was cut and then my eye could no longer focus. I thought - Maybe this is what it's like to be blind... only abstract, shifting lights - and became even more fearful at the thought of permanent loss of sight, the sense I revere above all others. When my corneal flaps were finally laid back in place I expected to see more clearly, but instead looked out an extremely blurry, dense fog. Darin was given instructions for the 3 types of eye drops + 1 tablet that I'm to take on a strict schedule for up to 2-1/2 months.

Back at our room, the numbing drops were wearing off and my eyes became increasingly pained by an itching, burning sensation that nothing would alleviate. I lay down for a few hours and tried to rest my eyes + sleep. Later, Darin brought me fresh papaya + bananas that he cut and served since I still couldn't see. It was a very fitful night of sleep that followed.



(Sunday, August 13)

Woke this morning for the first time in my memorable life to clear sight... almost. To back up a bit, my normal vision is so bad that everything beyond 5" becomes fuzzy blobs. NOW, I could identify objects from across the room. I could see that Darin's eyes were open as he lay next to me... Good, but not perfect. There was still some misting too, and things weren't crystal clear. I've continued to see a subtle improvement throughout the day, but I'm not jumping for joy, yet. They say the first few days are when you achieve your greatest improvement, but that it can take up to 6 months for everything to stabilize. I go tomorrow morning for my first check-up, but only time will tell.



(Monday, August 14)

Today was my first post-surgery follow-up. I was seeing very well besides a few intermitent blurry spots. These I'm told are just the eyes healing and should go away. In the office - Eye test performed, and "Guess What?" 20/20 Vision... For the first time since I was TEN YEARS OLD!!! I can't believe it... It seems too good to be true. If any one of you are considering this - DO IT! Whether in the States or abroad, just do your homework and find a doctor who's performed several 1,000's of procedures, so you know they've got experience, and one you feel comfortable with, who's answered your questions to satisfaction and put your mind at ease. One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself is the gift of sight. I'm sure glad I did :)



(Monday, August 21)

Today was my second post-surgery follow-up. Though still seeing well, I've noticed increased blurriness over the past week and my vision did not test so well today, around 20/30-40. The doctor says my eyes are healing exceptionaly fast and this has altered my perfect correction. I've read that this is not so uncommon, but it also seems to fit the description of another common complication referred to as "corneal haze". He's given me a new prescription for stronger drops to help and expects that my vision will probably stabilize somewhere in-between. If this is true, my vision will still be better than it ever was with contacts. Not to end this on a downbeat note, but after briefly having perfect vision I'm a bit sad to settle for anything less.