A Gulf of Difference with No Bridge in Sight

Luang Namtha, Laos - April 2

I've been reading a funny + informative book, passed on by a fellow American traveler after hearing that I'm originally from the central valley of California. It's about the culture clash between Hmong refugees from Laos, who relocated to Merced, and American doctors. MANY interesting tidbits about the beliefs of these shamanist-animist hill tribes and their difficulty assimilating into mainstream American culture. Merced isn't all that different from my home town except that Stockton got more Vietnamese + Cambodian refugees in the 1980's, while Merced got the bulk of the Hmong. I was too young at the time to understand why all these "foreign" kids had inundated my junior high school between my 7th - 8th grade years. All I knew was that they were "different", and different was scary, it was weird. My God, they don't even speak ENGLISH! So what's the typical response when kids/people are faced with something unfamiliar that they don't know how to deal with? They make up stories. Some ARE based on half-truths, and you've probably heard them too -

• They sell their daughters
• They think speed bumps are washboards for scrubbing clothes
• They eat dogs and who knows WHAT else?!

In truth -

• Many cultures DO have a bride price that's like our old tradition of a dowry
• Many cultures DO still wash their clothes by hand and they have NO idea what a speed bump is
• Many cultures DO eat dog, and snake, and insects because there's not an abundance of food. Unlike the U.S. where we kinda like to forget that an animal actually has to get KILLED to eat it, other cultures eat almost 100% of the animal and often THANK the animal for giving it's life beforehand. Also, every culture in the world has it's acceptable edible meats and it's ones that are taboo. In one of the more extreme examples, Americans CHOW DOWN on cows while Indians worship them.

Many other things refugees have done merely out of ignorance - Wearing underwear of the opposite sex, eating cat food, pouring water on an electric stove to extinguish it, washing rice in the toilet, planting crops in public parks, hunting pigeons + squirrels with crossbows... all this leads to a greater confirmation that these people are not only "weird", but they're "savages"! As a twist, here are some savage-like things the Hmong believe about American medical practice -

• Doctors eat the brains, livers and kidneys of their patients?
• When Hmong people die in the U.S. they are cut into pieces, put in tin cans and sold as food

These seem like MUCH greater fears than the former! But why did all these Hmong end up the the States to begin with? The U.S. was anxious to support an anticommunist government in Laos + to cut the military supply line on the Ho Chi Minh Trail to weaken the North Vietnamese, thus starting the "Secret War". More than 30,000 Hmong were recruited + trained by the CIA as guerilla fighters and to aid Air America pilots. These soldiers were paid an average of only $3/ month (in comparison, South Vietnamese soldiers earned between $197-$339/ month) and were only given food rations of rice. Not all these soldiers were actually "recruited" out of desire either, many were forced into combat because bombing had obliged them to abandon their fields, and in many cases their villages had even been obliterated by it. Most Hmong fought in the war until they died. By June of 1974, USAID had discontinued their relief program and the last Air America plane had left, leaving thousands of Hmong to fend for themselves in a devastated country with a government in power they had been fighting against. Thus began their agonizing exodus to Thailand.

The Hmong weren't exactly eager to emigrate to the U.S. either once their refugee status in Thailand ended. After all the scary rumors they'd heard and the belief that their culture would be repressed, most waited until they were in desperation. Once they arrived in the States, many suffered from severe depression once they realized that they would no longer be self-sufficient and instead have to RELY on government assistance. This was different from "The Promise" that they had received from CIA personnel in Laos where they'd been told that the Americans would aid them in reward for risking their lives fighting and then being forced to flee their country because they'd supported the "American War". Being shunned, ridiculed or even assaulted by Americans was also in direct contrast to the hero's welcome they'd expected to receive for aiding us.

Though learning all this HAS made me more sympathetic to our gulf of (mis)communication, there are still a couple issues that I'm having a very hard time making allowances for...

Issue #1

One of my main gripes in Laos has been that the people aren't very friendly, and I've been repeatedly reminded of a blog I wrote awhile back - Things That Never Happen at Home #1 - Intense Eye Contact with Strangers. What never happens at home is what I've been missing in Laos too. In stark contrast to the curiosity + friendliness we've been privvy to for the entirety of our trip since we landed in Asia, Laotians have been closed. Five weeks here and in the end I've just decided to save my breath and only greet with a smile unless someone speaks to me first. SO many downcast eyes in response to a "Saibadee!". SO many times of being looked through like I was invisible. I've had ENOUGH of the silent treatment... Give me some SPICE, like the Indians + Khmers; a SMILE, like the Nepali's or Thai's; some TEASING, like the Vietnamese... What is going on here?! Now I read that the Hmong consider direct eye contact to be invasive. As far as MY experience has been, you can't even HAVE communication without eye contact. This seems to be a cultural divide with no bridge. Other travelers we've met don't have a problem with being kept at a distance, but to me it's a message that "We don't want you here", and FAIR ENOUGH, look at what happened the LAST time we were here.

Issue #2

Several weeks in Laos hadn't won us over yet and we kept hoping we'd warm up to the place. We warmed up all right! As we headed north, the smoke began to make the heat even MORE unbearable. On one particularly grim stretch of road with fires burning on either side and only the blackened stumps of trees remaining, I commented to Darin that this is what Hell must look like! Soon after, we stopped in a small town for lunch and ash literally fell on our plates as we were trying to eat. How's that for grim?! Now I read that the practice of slash + burn agriculture has forever been inextricably intertwined with the nomadic lifestyle of the Hmong. They've been forced to move time and time again, over centuries, as various countries have tried to force them to integrate. This doesn't excuse the fact though that they're living a totally unsustainable and resource depleting lifestyle to provide their basic needs. THEIR belief though is in the faith in the earth's inexhaustible abundance. A Hmong proverb says "There is always another mountain". That's well and good for them and I have serious doubts whether any foreigner could persuade them to utilize better farming methods. The countryside will NEVER grow back though, and much that is burned is never even planted, and in my eyes, making it very ugly to even walk around. In their eyes, they're just trying to LIVE. Again, this seems to be another divide with no bridge. And again, it's another factor in feeling that Laos is just not the place for me.

All that said, it's without a doubt the most chill country I've ever been to, and if that's what you're after, Laos may be just the place for YOU.

Check the "link" for more photos from the remainder of our time in Laos. Also check the "Recommendations" link for our picks of where to go + what to see if you're planning a trip to Asia.

A Life of Privilege

Luang Prabang, Laos - March 25

As I was riding on the bus yesterday from Vientiane to Luang Prabang, some things more coherently coalesced for me that I've been thinking about for some time. Laos in particular has made it more prescient because of it's apparent poverty. Here's how it stacks up to other places we've been in the last 15 months -

National GNI/GDP per capita -
Laos $440 / Vietnam $620 / Cambodia $380 / Thailand $2,750 / Nepal $270 / India $720 / Spain $25,360 / USA $43,740

Population below poverty line -
Laos 30.7% / Vietnam 19.5% / Cambodia 40% / Thailand 10% / Nepal 31% / India 25% / Spain 19.8% (2005) / USA 12% (2004)

(These figures are based on a combination of stats from the CIA's World Fact Book and the World Bank. Note that poverty line is VERY difficult to assess as many rural economies have worked on a barter system for centuries, so though they may fall below the poverty line because they have no monetary income, they have good quality of life.)


I look at the string of villages along this newly paved highway (funded by the Japanese). Young children run around naked + shoeless for lack of clothes, bellies distended from malnutrition. The adults are lean + muscular and it's rare to see excess body fat, except in the cities. As our bus cruises past, people turn to stare at what is one of the more varied sights in their day. I feel like I'm on TV. I wave in an attempt to create a more human interaction in our brief exchange. The haves and have-nots.

There are so many times in the past year that I've felt disdain for how heartily the rest of the world is embracing our western ideal of materialism. It's seemed so easy to judge because I'VE been the one to indulge all my life and I can see that the model is flawed. But looking at the way the developing world lives and struggles to survive - Would I trade places? Not in a million years! Sure, I've longed for their strong sense of community, how people work together and still retain the virtues we've lost of sharing + being a good neighbor. Our lives may SEEM difficult + stressful, but it's about problems WE create and can control, namely work + money. In contrast, for any in the developing world, the days are spent farming or trying to sell a few bits of food or goods, just so they can put food on the table for their family. From what I've witnessed, there is never an abundance and NOTHING is thrown away (at the very least it's used to feed the animals). In contrast to the starkness of simple existence here is that of just being BORN in a first-world country. That fact ALONE has given me access to money (and making it fairly easily) and all the luxuries I've come to take for granted - A comfortable home (You can argue that a thatched hut is too, but there are no fans for reprieve from the sometimes unbearable heat, and the mosquitoes can be pretty voracious too), foods from around the world (Would you give up your imported olive oil + Hawaiian pineapple for a diet of rice + beans, or a measily bit of meat, EVERY DAY?), Travel (Some people have never been farther than the neighboring village), reading a book (There are no libraries or bookstores in MANY places, even if you HAVE had the luxury of an education and can read). SO many things I accept as my RIGHTS that these people will NEVER KNOW.

The grand ideas I have about educating them about sustainability - Not burning the fields, deforestation, limiting the use of plastic bags, not throwing garbage on the road... These idealistic notions are the LEAST of their concerns. And what of the growing materialism (for those that are even lucky enough to have the extra cash)? What is the first thing they'll buy? #1 - A moto - Practical, and at least not a gas guzzler. #2 - A TV - There goes the neighborhood, literally! But wouldn't I be starved for entertainment without anything else?! And once you have that, the flashy images you're exposed to - Things to buy, sex + violence... I could go on, but suffice to say that we've created a self-perpetuating downward spiral. No one WANTS to live simply. The future is consumerism, packaged in it's promise of happiness, with little to no regard for the ramifications. The future is not about "Us", it's about "Me".

This leads me to a conversation we had with a girl the other night who's working on a film about the ineffectiveness of "Aid". That people throw money at the worlds problems to ease their conscience, or even with good intentions, though the very nature of foreign aid is flawed. First, how can we even PRESUME to know what these people REALLY need (sometimes they're not even asked), and Two, so much of the money actually gets funneled into people's pockets and affording both administrators at home + expats abroad a pretty cushy lifestyle. In my opinion, this certainly isn't to say that you should do NOTHING. An organization she's found that seems to be doing work that is more cost-efficient + effective in the long-term is Ashoka, that's based in funding social entrepreneurs.

Also on a positive note, I was excited to see that back at home, the BurningMan spirit is continuing to spread and we've now got our OWN outreach organization, Burners without Borders. And THIS new news too! Wow, we're bummed to be missing out on this exciting time of positive change in SF.

Disenchanted in Paradise

Vang Vieng, Laos - March 20

Let me preface this by saying that we HAVE been on the road for 15 months, so maybe I'm a bit jaded at this point...

Once the haven of adventure seekers for it's access to natural beauty and opium dens, some now say that Vang Vieng has lost it's soul. It certainly does appear to have SOLD it's soul at the very least. Never before have I seen culture clash as on the streets of this 20-something thousand inhabitant village overrun by 20-something kids in search of the endless "Spring Break". The biggest attractions of today are the booze cruise river tubing trip and "TV Bars" that line the main road offering your choice of non-stop "Friends" (sitcom), "Simpson's" and a variety of movies. The clash unfortunately doesn't stop there but extends to the irreverence in which many of these kids dress, specifically the girls, as they hang about town. Despite notices both in town + guide books to respect this conservative culture in the way you behave + dress, ample flesh is revealed and we even witnessed one irate village woman yelling at a young brit's buxom cleavage while gesticulating for her to GO HOME. Yikes!

More generally, one of our biggest disap- pointments with the country so far has been the air quality. Not only is it getting very hot, but slash and burn agriculture is alive and well here (extending into Burma + Northern Thailand as well). The weather is really only UNBEARABLY hot here from April through June, but beginning in March farmers set fire to the fields creating a smoky haze that smothers the sun, obscuring the views and making photography basically pointless. This shot was taken at a particularly bleak point during our first day hike in an otherwise lovely valley surrounded by limestone karsts. The next couple days we toured more of the valley and spent time exploring caves with only our headlamps to light the way. Some demanded that we climb or descend ladders to maneuver through while others were viewed while reclining in an inner tube, propelling ourselves through water. A very good time!

Check the "link" for more photos from Laos. You'll see it's really not ALL bad.

The Mekong - Part 2

Vientiane, Laos - March 8

We've been in Laos a little over a week now. What a difference from Vietnam! Different people (in appearance + attitude), different food (much more similiar to Thai), different landscape (drier) and a different tourist crowd (more long-term travelers). We've been indulging in beers along the Mekong (Yes, we've looped back to it again) almost every day at sunset to enjoy the show. And what a show it is!


Yes, that's the sun! Looking like some big, over-ripe fruit hanging there for the picking. Off in the distance, guys are out playing football (soccer) on the sand bar, men are fishing in the shallow waters with elegant net contraptions, locals gather at riverside tables for grilled chicken + seafood and far outnumber tourists here. A refreshing change from all the other towns on the falang/gringo/foreigner trail here. And did I mention that Vientiane itself, especially for a capital city, is surprisingly chill. Seems like the pervading vibe of the country. Nice and easy.


Vientiane, Laos - March 14

Yes, still here. We've been hanging out to reunite with a friendly German couple we met in Ladakh, India last summer and who've come to Laos for this years' vacation. It's something like this that really hits home the passing of time as we've been on the road. Yesterday the four of us rented motos and cruised south of town to a funky Buddhist sculpture park.


Vientiane, Laos - March 16

Late afternoon (yesterday), Darin + I finally walked out on the dried sand bar of the shrunken Mekong, as we've been meaning to do all week, to get a closer view of all the action. The air was thick + heavy, laden with moisture + smelling of the earth. Like walking in a giant greenhouse. Our strolling eventually led us to the far western end of the sand bar where we were able to climb back up the steep bank. This dropped us in the middle of a friendly, residential neighborhood of wooden, stilt homes we hadn't yet explored. Quite a difference from the urban city where we'd begun! Here, the people greeted us with a smile and a "Saibadee!", something we've unfortunately been missing from most of the other Laotians we've encountered. We wanted to linger and soak up this unexpected hospitality, so we bought a beer and took a seat on a wooden bench lining the road (read - dirt track). I do like beer, but as good as it gets, it's still second-best to wine for me. But THIS! I had a Homer Simpson moment of epiphany with the first swallow. It was ICE COLD. The coldest I've had in as long as I can remember, especially in a place that's as apt to serve yours warm over ice as from a frig. When you're in air so heavy it's like moving through molasses, well, words can't even describe how heavenly it was. Right then and there I got a taste of what Bia Lao claims. I finally got the "Full taste of happiness." :)